Today we’ll be talking about my experiences by under ‘daddy’s’ care.
A Little About ” Daddy “
My daddy was just that, ” my daddy. ” In accordance with my earliest memories, I had the most loving, patient, caring, affectionate and nurturing father in the whole wide world. I adored my daddy, maybe even idolized him. Daddy’s name, is Earl M. Garcia, son of Lester Crowe and Gloria Garcia, ( now Gloria Newton ).
My daddy worked with, then, Securicor Security Services ( now G4S ). As, daddy was a single parent he had different female friends and family that would take care of me while he worked night and day. I remember that every chance my daddy was off duty, he spent that time with me. I recall my daddy, braiding my hair and singing to me anytime he ironed his clothes as he got himself ready for work.
Daddy carried me everywhere he went as long as it wasn’t work. Daddy didn’t drink alcohol, but he did smoke cigarettes. Of course, it wasn’t in my presence, but I smelt it on him. Being unfamiliar with the scent as a child, I never knew why he smelt that way, till becoming an adult.
Daddy And My Adventures
We both went to Coney island, where I remember him putting me onto a ride, where the seat of the ride was attached to a cable that stretched up a very tall pole. There were other seat hanging from the tall pole, where other parents strapped in their tiny tots safely in.
When daddy was finished securing his precious bundle of joy ( me ), he took a few steps back from the ride, and it slowly started to spin. Every time my seat came around I would look out for him and exclaim loudly and happily, ” Daddy!”
Stretching my little arms towards him, as though trying to touch him, while the ride’s speed increased. While I was having the time of my life, all the other children, creamed and cried for their mummies and daddies. I laughed and screamed with excitement, because my daddy was right there with me, smiling in amusement as I had no fear.
I couldn’t tell you how many times we were spun around, but when the ride came to it’s stop, daddy took away my restraints and lifted me out of the contraption, setting me safely on my feet next to him. He knew exactly what came next so he never let go of my hand. With the first step I took forward, I felt as though everything just went sideways.
For the next two minutes or so, I was daddy’s laughingstock. I never felt bad about it because I was still having loads of fun being dizzy. That night I was treated to cotton candy, popcorn, hot dogs and what ever else my tiny tummy could hold.
I don’t remember the occasion, but I assume, it must have been my fourth birthday, cause when I come to think of it now, in those days Coney island came to the island only once a year for the August holidays. I was a little daddy’s girl and he loved me so.
From quite a young age daddy taught me to speak well and pronounce my letters and words so that my dialect would not be as my sister’s in my last article. My daddy also taught me how break up my words, spell them and then send me to the dictionary to find the meaning.
By this time I could read children’s story books and my vocabulary was broader than most children my age, which gave me quite the advantage.
Every word I questioned him about, it was always the same. Anytime we went anywhere, after having a snack or drink, daddy would never tolerate me throwing my garbage at the side of the road or in the water ways. He would take whatever rubbish from me, hold it in his hand or place it in his pocket, till we got to a garbage bin or even sometimes till we got home.
One day, I accompanied daddy while he ran some errands. We were at the corner of sixth avenue Barataria, when daddy met up with a female friend and stood for a while to chat. My hands were so small compared to daddy’s, that I would wrap my miniature fingers around his giant pinky.
The conversation between the two went on for a bit long and I became bored with two. Starting a scan of my surroundings, my eyes rested on a home made ice cream cart not more the ten feet away from us. Not long after, I initiated my attack. Yanking on the edge of daddy’s shirt I uttered repeatedly, ” excuse me daddy? ”
I ensued two or three times, till daddy had excused himself from the conversation, came down to my level and gently asked me what I wanted. Obviously I craved an ice cream cone. ” Please allow me to finish my conversation, okay baby? ” He said sweetly, while giving me the eye that he was displeased.
They said their good byes and daddy said to me in a slightly stern voice, ” Crys, I don’t have the cash to buy you the ice cream right now, but, as soon as I get paid I will buy it for you. ” I just replied, ” okay daddy. ”
Just because I backed off then, that doesn’t mean I had forgotten. Even more now I anticipated my ice cream. Daddy never made me a promise he didn’t keep, so the first thing I got when he got paid was my ice cream.
Sunday school was a must, as daddy took me to a Pentecostal church every Sunday. Anytime daddy and I were home together, my duty was to pull his grey hairs from his head and clip his finger and toe nails when needed. A walk on his back helped to relax him and some times put him to sleep.
Upon leaving for work after dropping me off at the babysitter, I would always be kissed on the lips and when he returned, he would always bring me a little token ( a snack ) with another kiss on the lips.
Meeting Daddy’s Potential Wife
For some time, before daddy introduced Joy to me, he had been courting her.
There was a birthday party for one of my friends and I guess he invited her so that she and I could meet. She was very nice to me, but I felt unnerved by her presence. I clung to daddy and became very jealous, when ever daddy got too close to her or left me to dance with her.
Me being jealous and pouting during the party was unacceptable. So, daddy picked me up and they both danced with me. Daddy realized that I didn’t want her to dance with us so he politely asked Joy to allow him to dance with me alone and she gracefully bowed out.
I stood on his feet for some songs, then daddy picked me up and danced with me till fell asleep.
A Rolling Stone
Never, could I remember, being in one place for very long while being with daddy. There wasn’t just one babysitter for my care at any given time. One of the young ladies he dropped me off at, lived with her brother and sister in a bored house upon stilts, at Maracus St. Joseph.
She and her siblings were really nice to me and they took really good care of me. Sometimes I would stay with them for more time than I should’ve, while daddy worked double and triple shifts.
One day we were all out in the yard. Their brother was cutting the tall grass and I sat under the house playing house. I used to watch them in the kitchen while they cooked, so I decided to pretend to cook.
There was a big knife under the house so I picked it up, took a handful of the freshly cut gas and began my prepping. Slicing away at the grass, I looked up at my babysitter as she told me to be careful.
Right then, I felt a sharp pain across the nail of my left fore finger. At first, upon feeling the sharp pain I didn’t react, but, when I looked down and saw all that blood that’s where the wailing started.
My sitter ran to me and with the edge of her top, she held my finger between the material and her fingers as she sent her sister for plaster. I hated waring a plaster so much that, about an hour later it was off and in no time it was replaced.
Sometimes, my sitter and her sister would have a night out, so they would leave me in the care of their brother. Usually, it was okay and he would let me watch movies and eat things, that I wasn’t normally allowed. I would even get to stay up late.
This night seemed like any other, until it came time for me to hit the sack. My sleeping area was a small couch in his bedroom any time the girls went out for the night. While I was about to snuggle up with my borrowed stuffed toy, the man called out to me from the darkness of the room.
He had startled me because, usually by the time I ventured to bed he would be asleep. Tonight was totally different. Earlier in the day he caught me taking a gander at a beautiful porcelain ornament he had on a mantle in his room.
He reminded me about it by asking me if I liked it. I shock my head and he said, ” if you do something for me I will give it to you. ” A big part of me was reluctant, but the smaller part overwhelmed the other, because I really loved and wanted the ornament.
I stood in front of him as he sat up on edge of his bed, he then pulled his already erected penis from his slacks and told me to put my mouth on it. I declined and felt like crying not really knowing why.
He motioned to the ornament atop the mantle and reassured that if I did this for him, the ornament would be mine. Taking my hand, he placed on the shaft of his penis and I felt it pulsate. Now I was close enough so he made me kneel next to the bed in front of him, placed his hand behind my head guiding my mouth to the bulge of muscle.
With his hand still keeping mine in place on the shaft, his other lightly applied force to my little head, eased a bit when I gagged then repeated the act. Using my hand he stroked the shaft as he kept the motion with his hand on my head.
Tears ran from my eyes, and I found it difficult to breathe, but no matter how I tried to resist, his strength over powered mine. After, what felt like forever, I tasted something salty and threw up all over his groin so he pushed me away.
I didn’t understand what I was feeling, but this feeling would be one I would have to face later down in my young life. He told me not to tell anyone and that I could be sure that prize was mine. Making a promise, he told me I would get my reward in the morning.
Soon after we could hear the girls opening the front door to enter the house. He picked me up, put me on the couch motioning me to close my eyes. I heard my sitter asking as she entered his bedroom if I was any trouble. At once, he said no and beckoned her to leave me alone, because she was going to move my into her room.
The following morning I awoke to the sound of daddy’s voice. He was being updated on my behavior all that they knew of, which was always a good report. I got up and was organized by my sitter to go home. I don’t know why, I said nothing. Daddy took my hand and led me out of the room while I never took my eyes off the ornament until it was out of my sight.
Remembering this makes my feel sick, not just the fact of what took place, but it makes sick that I kept that dirty secret for so long. I wish I had the courage that I have now to speak up and say something, anything would’ve been better than saying nothing at all.
Playing Hide And Seek
There were children in the area that would come to my sitter and request that I come out and play. We would go swimming in the nearby river, play tag, cricket, soccer and hide-and-seek. All the children in the group were all older than I was and there was this boy within the group that I had taken quite a liking too.
Vuan was eleven years old and it seemed that he liked me a lot to. I was unaware of the extent in which his liking ran.
Like any other day, the group of children called upon me to come out and play. I put on my bathing suit and followed them to the river. We all splashed around and laughed loudly at anyone that couldn’t take the water splashed in their faces.
After some time one of the other girls, came up with the idea that we should play ” hide-and-seek ” and we all agreed. To choose who would count first, Voun being the eldest led ” innie, mini, minnie, moe. ”
First up, was yours truly. I counted to ten and was on my way. I sought and found all except two who was hiding in the same place and got to reached home base, when I passed their hiding place straight.
Every time we played hide-and-seek, Voun would take me to hide with him. Normally we hid well and sometimes we were caught, but most times we won’t. Today was different to other day.
Suggested by Vuan, we hid in an unfinished structure in the vicinity of the river, which had a full view of all the points of entry. I was just trying to stay hidden and looking out for the seeker, when suddenly Vuan spun me to face him and began kissing me.
He stuck his tongue in my mouth while searching for mine. Being so young I just followed his lead. As, I pushed my tongue into his mouth, he sucked on it and I felt my knees buckle. He proceeded to kiss and suck my neck, remove my bathing suit’s strap from off my left shoulder as his lips followed the bareness of my naked skin, while he sandwiched my tiny body between the wall and his own.
Within seconds, we heard the approaching footsteps of the seeker so Vuan quickly put my strap back onto my shoulder and directed me to stay hidden. The direction the boy came from he spotted us easily and we were found.
The young man looked at Vuan and I then asked ” wa all ya was doin? ” We both said ” nothing ” then I ran off to meet the others. After this incident, anytime I went out to play with the group, Vuan would avoid me like black plague.
Every time approached him he spoke to me so harshly I would cry. He told me that I should leave him alone cause I was ugly and he didn’t like me.
Of course, I cried, I just couldn’t comprehend what had happened or why it was taking place. All the children laughed at me which made me feel even worse so I ran home and never wanted to go play with any of them again.
Don’t Want To Share
It was just daddy and I since I was an infant, so he was all I knew. He was my everything, he was my world. So…., when the idea came about, that I may have to start sharing what had been mine alone for so long, it didn’t sit well with me. I could see that daddy really liked her and I always thrived to keep my daddy happy.
For years within my youth, I always used to think that all these events were just dreams because they were always fuzzy and never to the fore front of my mind. In the years to come they would become even more vivid till I just couldn’t turn it off.
Little did I know the rough road I would have to travel. No one could ever fathom the characters I would be met with. The enemy had started his snow ball of operation “BREAK HER ” rolling.
Being young we never understand WHY things as such happens to us and we never see the good plans Jahovah has for our lives. Some people come into adulthood still tormented by their demons and never find or accept Jesus in to their lives as their Lord and Savior.
Because of this they never find His peace.
Today I have found strength in every experience through the grace of God and have also found my place in a community of 2.3+ million individuals that has welcomed me into their large family network. Wealthy Affiliate is a society within its own respect.
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